So, I'm still out here Dear Reader.
Yes, I know I am awful about updates, but there are people trying to
kill me and the other people around me, so you know what? It's not
unreasonable to expect a break. I do feel hella guilty about the hit to
my writing though. I think that maybe this is one of those times when
I'm building up experiences that can be written about for a long, long
On to business, this deal about Caster Semenya is fascinating to me. First, I
think that it is kind of horrible that the official response to a women
being a badass athlete is to suspect her of cheating. That's lame. As some of you know, I am a huge fan of the Tour d' France. Cycling is
a sport that has been all but brought down by doping and that kind of
cheating is toxic. At it's best, sports is an expression of what all of
humanity is capable of. In my opinion, screwing the rules says all the wrong
things about humanity.
However, what ever the truth about Semenya turns out to be, she certainly rocks the running. I hope that she has come by it honestly.
That said, I a thrilled to see a sort of open and honest discussion
on the lack of definiteness of gender assignment. It's nice to see
people openly admitting that gender is not just a 0 or a 1. It's
complex, there's much more going on. It is a pleasant change to watch as Semenya forces people to think
about their basic understandings of maleness and femaleness. Think about
the realities of those things.
Once people realize that there is more to gender than certain stereotypical physical traits it throws them for a loop. As for being trans, if males can be XX and females
can be XY, then what males a "real" man or woman? Unfortunately, the answer I have seen
tossed around is the ability to bear children. This
reminds me unpleasantly of the South Park episode where Mr./Ms. (and God
knows I hate putting it like that, but it's a cartoon, it is trying to
be offensive, and that's what is going on) Garrison transitions back to
male after a mtf sex change the season before. Garrison goes through all this because Garrison is convinced that
the definition of real gender is in the ability to either father or bear
Of course, South Park rarely comes entirely down on one side or
the other. The episode ends with another teacher telling Garrison than
his wife is infertile. Garrison responses stupidly, saying the teacher
better get an HIV test 'cause he's sleeping with another man.
Everybody's offended and now end scene.
But, however stupid, the point does get across. Because, any universal or
hard and fast definition of gender is so full of holes that it is laughably stupid. We kinda are what everyone accepts us as.
It's a shitty definition but, hey, hopefully I'll be alright with it once I'm out
on the closet and more fully transitioned. Selfish? Oh yeah. But it's
Anyway, I got to get back to breathing sand and smoke from the oil
well fires. There should be something new up at least once a week.
Stick around. But never, never come to Iraq. This place is kind of lame.
So, it is Basketball time, March Madness. I have up unto this point on my blog avoiding talking about sports. Why?
Well, I'm trying to make it as difficult as possible for you wonderful people out there out on the world wide intertubes to figure out who I actually am. I'm on my way off to Iraq with a pretty hoo-ahed out Army unit, and what with me both being and am talking about being a godsdamned queer and all, well, I worry about somebody putting it all together and murdering me.
But that's not the point of this post. The point of this post is that I really want to talk about the NCAA tournament, specifically how excited I am to see some of my favorite teams there, how I can't wait to see a certain team loose, and the difficulties of managing a bracket pool.
It's just difficult, because, well, let's say I'm really into the Zags, but would give a finger to see UCON loose(fucking Huskies, how often have you ruined my NCAA bracket?). Let's say I go through, explain why not only is Gonzaga the single best team out there this year, but also that that school, that program deserve to win in a way that the rest of those teams could only dream of. That if the Zags don't go all the way, or at least make it to the Final Four, well, that just means that there is something fundamentally wrong with the moral structure of the universe.
And then let's say that I go on to explain why the men's basketball program at UCON will never be as successful as the women's program, and how I think that fact creates in that program an ugly tension that makes them unworthy of their high placement in the tournament.
Of course, in real life I probably don't think anything like that at all. I'm just being all hypothetical, creating a scenario.
Now let's say that some angry, depressed, deeply closeted E-4 goes online and googles “queer” and “soldier” and comes upon my blog. He undergoes that big horror that only a person who really and truly ashamed of himself can feel, but keeps on reading. He notices that analysis of the Zags three point shooting sounds awfully familiar, then he says, hmm, I wonder if that SGT CombatQueer over at my unit might be some sort of... queer.
And, over the months over in the sandbox, that fellow grows in his tension, and one day decides to show what a man he is by killing me.
And that's why I can't talk about basketball in the way I'd like.
And I'm not too sad about it. Sure the Rays winning gives credence to the idea that Florida is a real place, but come on, how can the Sox always be underdogs if they always manage to come form behind and win the series? No, it's not like ACC basketball where a certain team(not going to say which one, but I bet some of you can guess) needs to win all the time to keep me happy. No, the BoSos can loose just as often as they want so long as they continue to provide me with three to five hour chunks of time in which to drink beer and stare at a TV.
Incidently, I'm really, really looking forward to the election being over. We just need to win this thing, move past it. We need to stop the ridiculously dishonest smears, the idolizing of Joe Something-Or-Others, the bullshit in general. Not that bullshit isn't fun, bullshit's lots of fun when it's the Sox or my ACC basketball team.
Seriously folks, we're almost there. Let's just push on through and be done. This campaign is, God help us, real life. We don't have the time or the privilidge of thinking of it as a game. Let's just win, and let it be over